Bad Teacher

“Too Bad”

I used to like Cameron Diaz. But in her new so-called comedy “Bad Teacher” it’s so easy to dislike her. Not just her character, but Diaz herself. And I’m not even sure if that’s a compliment to her performance. Diaz is playing a school teacher who is meant to be disliked. And she’s doing a hell of a job. It’s just a shame that the movie she’s acting in is so awful and stunningly unfunny.

“Bad Teacher” is directed by Jake Kasdan who, only a few years ago, made one of my favorite recent comedies in “Walk Hard”. So my expectations were high. I found myself trying to like it more. There were awkward moments of forced giggles, only to be embarrassed when I realized that the joke wasn’t really very funny at all.

Even the general plot makes you wonder how anyone could have signed on to make this movie. Diaz plays a bitter middle school teacher with a chip on her shoulder the size of a mountain. She’s a loner who is overflowing with bad habits and genuine ugliness. Her only goal in life is to marry a rich guy, not for love, but for his money. And she’s quite openly sincere about that.

She thinks the best way to lure wealthy men is to increase the size of her breasts. When she learns that her breast-enhancement surgery will cost neary ten grand, she uses her teaching position to create all kinds of oddball schemes to raise that money. From stealing her students’ car wash money, to conspiring to steal the state’s scholastic test answers, Diaz bounces all over the map as a cold-hearted lifeless bitch.

Making matters worse is co-star Justin Timberlake, Diaz’s real-life ex. Their scenes together are uncomfrotable to watch as their chemistry is clearly gone. They share a ridiculous sex scene with their clothes on! It’s probably meant as comedy, but it doesn’t even rate a chuckle from the audience.

DVD Double Feature:

In 1999, Alexander Payne made the ultimate ‘bad teacher’ comedy. It’s called “Election”. Reese Witherspoon plays a sexy, driven overachiever. Her teacher, played by Matthew Broderick, becomes obsessed with preventing her from winning an election for class president. Hilarious, truly inspired, and far superior to “Bad Teacher” in every way.